Adelaide Pote, MS, LAMFT

How I Approach Therapy:

People talk a lot about difficulties with communication, but often it’s not that you and your partner(s) don’t know how to communicate or problem-solve. Rather, these things become much harder when the stakes are high. And the stakes are high because your person matters to you.

When your relationship feels at risk, of course you might feel angry. Of course you might feel scared or sad. I don’t see those responses as problems to fix, but as meaningful signals that something important is happening.

So rather than simply offering advice, I draw from Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and Internal Family Systems (IFS) to help create moments of safety, connection, and attunement between you and your partner(s). These experiences don’t just shift how you think in your relationship, but even more so, they can change how you feel with each other. And when you’re feeling more connected, your ability to communicate and respond to one another often becomes more accessible again.

I approach my work from a place of curiosity, compassion, and a genuine sense of wonder about people and relationships. I think love and vulnerability can be both frightening and deeply beautiful, and I aim to create a space where you can move toward connection at your own pace, without judgment.

It’s important to me to be attentive to the ways dominant cultural narratives can shape how we see ourselves and our relationships. I often integrate elements of Narrative Therapy to help clients explore and reshape those stories in ways that feel more authentic and aligned with their lived experience.

I work with adults, couples and partner(s) navigating:

• The exhausting cycle of feeling like too much — or never quite enough

• Emotional disconnection that makes even simple conversations feel impossible

• Trauma and the ways it quietly shapes how safe love feels

• Gender identity and the deeply personal journey of living more authentically

• Polyamory and non-traditional relationship structures

• Neurodiversity and the relational dynamics that come with it

• Religious trauma and reshaping the stories you were handed about yourself

• The parts of yourself — and your partner — that have felt too hard to accept

• A longing to feel genuinely chosen, seen, and safe in your relationship

A Little About Me:

Outside of the therapy room, you can find me moshing at metal concerts, spending time on local trails, paddling on the river, rolling around at jiu jitsu, or making homemade pierogi. I feel most at home when I’m connecting with the Earth or with other people, and I try to keep a sense of curiosity and wonder about both.

I grew up in a conservative evangelical community where it wasn’t always safe to be myself, which informs my sensitivity to experiences related to marginalized identities and religious trauma. I’ve done significant personal work to deconstruct my upbringing, and I now draw meaning from an earth-based spirituality connected to my Polish ancestry.